I am writing this post while 'in transit,' heading back to South Korea. I have just concluded an amazing, at times crazy, and above all eye opening visit home. I want to (and will) discuss lots of stuff from my 2 week vacation in Ohio (never thought I'd say that), but first I have to describe what experiencing reverse culture shock is like!
To start, I could understand people. Living in a foreign country for a year does a couple things to ya (in a short-term kind of way). First you get used to tuning people out. It wasn't until recently that I have reached the level of Korean language skills that I can actually understand some of what people are talking about around me, but I really have to make the effort to listen. When I came back to the States I was often feeling either nosy or annoyed by being able to understand other people's conversations.
I may have given this look to a few people when I first started adjusting..
Another thing you start to do is generally pick up some cultural things, such as bowing and using both hands to give and receive items. It was funny because I visited my mother's work place one day, and one of her co-workers noticed that I bowed to them. I didn't even realize that I had done that until she mentioned it to me later on.
Another small, yet significant one, is that in the Korean language a very common word is "neh." It has several applications and meanings, but it basically means "yes" or "yeah, yeah, I understand." Well that goes a long way in a foreign country, so naturally my two most commonly used words have got to be neh and "ani-yo" (no). Because of that I was walking around for a few days saying "neh" to people. Followed by the realization: oh yeah, that's a fancy old way to say "no"... oops.
I'm pretty sure this look from my Aunt Colleen is just due to a weird timing of the photo, but I know I drew some looks like this saying things like neh (when I clearly meant 'yeah')
There are other subtle things like how people talk, or actually being able to have a conversation with a store clerk (more than a few basic phrases that is), but there was one more big one that stood out to me. The general American attitude that has roots from the economic system of capitalism: strive for perfection, and try to be the best. Depending on where you're at and who you talk to (socially), it varies, but it is definitely there. From the competitive edge of trying to get the last word in, to reminding your buddy that you beat him in a sports bet. Americans are competitive, and like to boast about their success. Of course that is generalizing, and all Americans don't try to come off as arrogant, but I sensed it in the cultural attitude. It is just ingrained in the way we interact.
In Korea, and I think in the other Eastern Asian countries, that is really toned down. There is competitiveness in a sports and between children, but not with most adults (on the surface anyways). There may be competitiveness (maybe why Korea has the #1 school system in the world), but in a much more 'read between the lines' kind of way. It is a respectful, and seemingly passive culture, where you bow to show humility, and you downplay your own talents to remain modest.
I could never really see exactly why many people around the world have accused Americans of being arrogant and/or rude (though I had some guesses) until I returned to America, and witnessed the culture through the eyes of a foreigner. With that being said, I don't think Americans are arrogant. I think that is how we come off to foreigners because of subconscious things we do that are simply cultural norms. Some people in America are arrogant, and many are not. Some people in Korea (and probably every other nation) are arrogant, and many are not. The people that generalize and say that all Americans think that they're the best have not taken the time to understand the culture. Now WITH THAT BEING SAID, I believe it is important to have the same open mindedness when first experiencing another culture, because people are just people, and the culture around them helps determine the 'rules' the play by, or the norms that they follow. I've always tried to have this open mentality to others, but experiencing it in reverse is especially attention grabbing!
The best part about being back in the States (in regards to culture/culture shock/reverse culture shock) is that as soon as I finally felt comfortable and at home.. I left. Now that is a little annoying, but it just reminds me that I'm on this adventure, and that I need to keep expecting these kinds of experiences.
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